Thinking of Buying a Car?

Hmmm... Think again... what will it be?

ACURA
Asia's Curse Upon Rural America

AUDI
Another Ugly Deutsche Invention

BMW
Bought My Wife
Brings Me Women
Brings More Women but
Broke My Wallet

CHEVROLET
Can Hear Every Valve Rap On Long Extended Trips

DODGE
Drips Oil, Drops Grease Everywhere
Dead On Day Guarantee Expires

FIAT
Failed Italian Automotive Technology

FORD
Fast Only Rolling Down Hill

GM
Garbage Motors
Gluteus Maximus

HONDA
Hallmark Of Non-Destructable Automobiles

HYUNDAI
Hope You Understand Nothing's Driveable And Inexpensive

KIA
Keep Insurance Around

SAAB
Shape Appears Ass-Backwards

SUBARU
Screwed Up Beyond All Repair, Usually

TOYOTA
Too Often Yankees Overprice This Auto

VOLVO
Very Odd Looking Vehicular Object

PORSCHE
Proof of Rich Spoiled Children Having Everything