Actual Police Comments

The following 15 Police Comments were taken off of actualpolice car videos:

#15 "Relax, the handcuffs are tight because they're new.They'll stretch out after you wear them awhile."

#14 "Take your hands off the car, and I'll make your birthcertificate a worthless document.

#13 "If you run, you'll only go to jail tired."

#12 "Can you run faster than 1200 feet per second? In case you didn't know, that is the average speed of a 9mm bullet fired from my gun."

#11 "So you don't know how fast you were going. I guess that means I can write anything I want on the ticket, huh?"

#10 "Yes, Sir, you can talkto the shift supervisor, but I don't think it will help. Oh...did Imention that I am the shift supervisor?"

#9 "Warning! You want a warning? O.K., I;m warning you not to do thatagain or I'll give you another ticket."

#8 "The answer to this last question will determine whetheryou are drunk or not. Was Mickey Mouse a cat or a dog?"

#7 "Fair? You want me to be fair? Listen, fair is a place where you goto ride on rides, eat cotton candy, and step in monkey DOO."

#6 "Yeah, we have a quota. Two more tickets & my wife gets a toasteroven."

#5 "In God we trust, all others we run through NCIC."

#4 "Just how big were those two beers?"

#3 "No Sir, we don't have quotas anymore. We used to havequotas but now we're allowed to write as many tickets as we want."

#2 "I'm glad to hear the Chief of Police is a good personal friend ofyours. At least you know someone who can post your bail."

#1 "You didn't think we give pretty women tickets?...You're right, we don't... Sign here.